Sunday, June 21, 2009

Dinner Date Conversation re Righteousness

In between purchasing my sushi and Haki's Indian (food, not an immigrant), a young man approached us and heralded Haki. The pair of lads caught up for 5 minutes or so before we carried on our way.

Later, "fine dining" in the food court, Haki sat bemused. He led, in a rising tone, "That guy that just came up to me..."

"Yeah?" I responded, in encouragement.

"Well, he used to live on the same street as me growing up." Pause. "I was really mean to him. Like, when we played Hide 'n' Seek, I wouldn't go find him. I'm surprised he likes me now."

I clenched my teeth and inhaled through them as though in pain, "You were a punk when you were a kid. I'm glad I didn't know you then. I would have said, 'Ah...no thanks'."

Haki jibed, "You were more of a punk".

I tucked my chin in to accompany my defence, "Was not. Maybe as a teenager, actually. Nope, still, overall, I was not as bad as you."

"You so were. I was way better than you." Haki was wearing his I'm-too-sexy-for-this-shirt-face in support of his assertion.

I cocked my head sideways,"I'm sorry, are we getting the righteous scales out now?"

"Yep!" he confirmed.

Hmmm...my sarcasm appeared to have led to something I hadn't anticipated. I leaned in. "I didn't miss seminary. You slept. A lot."

"80% is a pass."

"Were you reading your scriptures every day?"

"Family reading doesn't count, honey."

"I read individually too!"

Haki squinted. "Really?"

"Yes, really. I never stole anything from a shop."

"You mean the apple I gave back?"

My mouth dropped. "You stole an apple? I was swinging out at air with that one. You really stole an apple?"

"Like I said, I gave it back."

"Still, you stole. I only stole food from my parents...like, treats from the pantry. Which isn't really stealing...that's just childhood."

"It's still stealing. You stole. In fact, your type of stealing is worse."

"Really?" I said.

"Yes, who takes food from their own parents? Honestly?"

"You do. Now."

"Well, I'm a convert; that automatically makes me more righteous."

I glared.

Snickering, Haki continued, "I knew that'd get ya."

I shook my head sourly.

Haki then threw out, as though playing a trump card, "I served a mission."

Silly boy.  If we're going to stoop the low and obvious 'My Daddy's bigger than yours...'

"I pushed a baby out."

"Touché."
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