Friday, August 14, 2009

The Unpleasant Thing

Yesterday something happened. Something rather unpleasant.

When something unpleasant happens, I find quick-fix silver lining in the knowledge I can tell the world about the unpleasantness of it. By that, I mean post here about it. I explained this consolation to Haki thus: "I like knowing I can write about it, and then get 15 comments in response that empathise, or at least identify the humour of the situation." [Pause] "Okay, 3 comments".

But yesterday, this unpleasant thing was rather private. As a result, it was made more unpleasant, as I'd turned the situation inside-out, searching for the silver lining, but found none.

I called Amee. I called my sister. And just to make it a trifecta, I called my other sister.

I must note here, that when I informed Haki of The Unpleasant Thing via a text message on my walk home, he went about doing chores around the house to ready it for my arrival. It was really rather sweet. It cheered me up considerably.

Nonetheless, I felt robbed. How dare such a wonderfully unpleasant thing happen to me, and I can't even tell the world! (There I go again, calling my modest readership the earth. /Sigh.)

Then my personalised T-shirt came. It helped a little.

This morning, a friend called. I told her about The Unpleasant Thing. I checked the sense of urgency to share that I'd been feeling. No change. Scott, overhearing some of the conversation, entered the living room and asked, "So, what's this?" I told him The Unpleasant Thing. He didn't even flinch.

And that was when I decided, The Unpleasant Thing didn't have to be so private. Scott had digested it and lived. Him being a man and all.

And so, I shall tell you, dear earth, of The Unpleasant Thing, with a warning, and using euphemisms...so that you may a) read into it what you wish and b) run away now if you are afraid of being icked out by womanly matters.

The Unpleasant Thing

Yesterday I went to the doctor for a certain type of "check-up". I had Baby E with me. A nurse approached me and asked, "Are you here for immunisations?" She nodded to the adorab-cherub on my lap.

"No, I came for that yesterday. Today my appointment's for me." I explained.

With no regard for the presence of other humans within the waiting room, the woman pressed, "So what are you here for?"

"For me," I repeated.

The woman didn't stop, "Yes, but what?"

And so I explained the nature of my visit...to all in earshot; the type of check-up I required.

Unpleasant, yes?

But wait.

That is when the nurse balled her fingers, stuck out her thumb, and pressed it to her forehead as she cried, "Bags not me!"

All this before I got to have the actual procedure...with another nurse.

Un pleasant.


Maybe it could have been worse. Maybe it could have been more inappropriate. I guess it could have been this.



P.S.

I paid a visit to the opt-out nurse later that afternoon. I just had to. Words were had. She agreed she had been highly unprofessional. I got back into the car, where Haki and Baby E were waiting. I continued to marvel at the nurse for three blocks driving; "What if it was my first [check-up]? It's not like ladies like having it done, either. I think if it had been someone else, I might have left".

Haki interjected, "Honey, it's over now, you're just working yourself up".

I was silenced. But loudly my thoughts quipped back, It's not over 'til the blog lady sings.
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